Thanks Everyone,
I have for many years known my own date of death. I have accepted that without any problems. Its tough when I know the dates of other people and I do not tell them or anyone for that matter.
I feel as though I had let my ex father in law down. His daughter and I divorced back in 2009 and I never went back around her family after that. Mainly because they only saw her side of what happened and showed no interest in me. I saw exs dad 2 or 3 times at kids events and we were cordial to each other. The last time I saw him was back in Oct 2017 at my grand babies birthday party. We spoke for a few minutes only.
I wanted to go see him when he was on his death bed but in away
I didn't feel as if I had a right to or that I should. I really felt guilty about it afterwards though. He was a very forgiving type person so I am sure he forgave me. I did however go to his service and felt good about it. I felt like I belonged there with he family. And they accepted my current wife as well.
I have so much to learn and so many questions I want to ask, no idea where to start !!!
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