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Old 16-04-2018, 06:23 PM
Saoirse Walker Saoirse Walker is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 17
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by innerlight
That is a good question to ponder upon? I would imagine it falls into the people don't truly know someone, until they get too close to them. I would imagine that in many cases they don't realize things would be bad. Until it happens. Other cases they see it, or perhaps they are in denial about it, or they think things maybe different for them, or that perhaps they could help change them, showing them a better way.

I know, I have been in that with relationships before. Where you think that maybe you'd be different than everyone else in the past. Love can make you forget everything you think you know about things, and even go against what you would normally do. I'm sure we've all be in those shoes.

Which then brings it back to the same train of thought on it's not the person we are after, but love. We do things we wouldn't normally do. Act in ways we wouldn't normally do. Tolerate more than we should. All because of what we see as love... But then, is it truly love we are seeing during those times or a twisted perversion of what we think love is? Stemming from perhaps an emptiness within us...

Abuse also doesn't have to be something so direct as being rude, or nasty. But abuse could be in the way of someone playing games with their emotions. I've seen that happen plenty of times with people around here as well. Where they are left with so much uncertainty about their relationship. So when I spoke of why people chase an abusive person it wasn't only in a direct toxic way.

The fact that this is a broad phenomena with the predominant response being this way, I find I haven't wanted to be judgmental. The modern relationship dynamic is a new thing. Birth control has only been legalized since 1972. A lot has changed over the decades, and we don't always have a precedence to go by. I've noticed a lot of troubles in relationships are instincts coming into play, and when you notice everybody doing it, you know you're up against a strong instinct that impacts a gender. We haven't had enough years to ace it all. I think the instinct to chase the person you have a connection with might have to do with so many centuries in which building a family was the way to survive.

One thing I know for certain is that in spite of having lived a life with great health practices, emotionally, mentally and physically, when things ended with the man I thought I had a twin flame experience with I met with my first real challenge in life. It's like I had managed all other challenges, but this one had much to teach me because it was truly difficult and my emotions and actions were truly out of character and baffling. I got a real chance to look at weaknesses I didn't know I had because normal circumstances didn't bring them out. But it wasn't until I stopped judging myself and started accepting and loving through it all that I started to really change the behavior I had that troubled me.
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