[Shivani Devi]

Also there's one more thing..

You don't have to or need to let other people corner you into asserting your own godhood if that's not what you truly believe in your heart.

I had to learn that lesson the hard way myself.

You love God, right? You may love yourself too...but you know deep down that loving yourself and loving God are two different things...like chalk and cheese they are.

People try to tell me that I am God too and to 'become that which I love', thus negating God's existence into total non-existence...into a void...into nothingness...or even *gasp* into bliss.

I know, I honestly know in my heart of hearts that if I love God enough as being not what I am or who "I am not" and if I love Him with all my heart and soul as just being God...as existing both in my heart and out of it and fully surrendering myself at His feet, He will do what is best for me...take me where I need to go.

Yeah, I love Him, but I don't surrender myself as often as I should to Him...I don't open myself up in prayer as often as I should and I don't allow myself to just sit in silence...appreciate nature...do all those things that show just how much I love Him as often as I should and hence why I suffer and I'm miserable, thinking that He is playing me for an idiot too.

It takes time, it takes patience and it often takes total seclusion from others...even so-called 'spiritual people' on a 'spiritual forum' to reach that awareness within and often, while ever you listen to others, you will never find yourself.... sad, but true.