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I think this is an illustration where learned, but still unkind, behavior is 'made right' by claiming it is God's will.
It is not God's will, that is a cheap and superficial excuse. Something must the past of this woman that led her to do what she does, probably in all similar situations.
I have no problem in judging that person as well as Gautam's response here. We live in a dualistic world where judgment is required.
"Oneness" applies to the celestial world, e.g. expressing it in the believe that this woman has the potential to find more appropriate ways of dealing with her (suspected) fear. A true teacher would work on that in a subtle way and not ascribe to God what isn't God's.
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