[jay.kishan]

I have high regard for all the people out here and their opinions on the subject.

I have not read about this topic BUT, as many, i have been through this horror.
For a long time, there was this everlasting debate between two people in the same mind. One so called "Spiritual" and one the me 'Old Self'

Confusions and this internal chatter was so high at times that i had to sit alone with my hands on my head. I was very confused but how, what is happening and what should i do.

I did not depend on any teacher, philosopher, guru mantra or meditation. I was just observing my chatter, the BOTH, Spiritual and the old self.
The spiritual self was having much fun, with the hallucinations, meeting Angels, always telling me the right action and so on. While the old self was clinging to old habits so there was this endless chatter and inner conflict in the same person. Should i do , or should i not ? Control my anger ? Or let it go ? Conflict in everything that i did

Sir, the spiritual self, or the old self which i was telling right now, was just my illusion. Which thought created.
And i meditated, had experiences lol and so on , which was ACTUALLY feeding the same ego but with a different name called 'Spiritual'

This is how, I deceived my self, this is how a normal person deceives himself.
The Ego becomes Spiritual. Nothing else.

Spirituality begins, when all dualities and tricks of mind are understood. Then the real meditation begins, which has no CENTER, CONTROLLER, OR THE ONE DOING THE MEDITATION. When mind is silent, you are IN MEDITATION. You then dont have to sit and breathe and stand on your hands to do yoga to have a silent mind. How self takes positions to protect itself. Seeks shelter in meditations and so called spiritual stuff. Which is nothing but the SAME EGO DOING MEDITATIONS, APPLYING FORMULAS, TO ACHIEVE SOMETHING.

And the irony ? Meditation with the same confused mind. ! and then we pretend we are spiritual. The ego pretends. And WE IDENTIFY WITH IT.


This is my own journey, right or wrong i dont know. Science supports if or not. I dont know. Will people agree ? I dont know, Most are deceiving themselves like i was . Maybe i am still :)

SO I NEVER TAKE SEHLTER IN ANY BELIEF.

5th dimension, angels . All projection of thought. I am a hindu. Ill see Shiva, a christian will see Jesus, and buddhist will se Buddah. Obviously, we will have visions because this is what we a re expecting, this is why we are meditating. The mind will CREATE AN EXPERIENCE.


Sir, keeping aside all this. I just want to focus on this life, 3d or 4d what you may call. Just living with awareness. And my understanding of this WHOLE DRAMA, was exposed infront of me by my own self. So NOW, my mind is better, The spiritual SELF is exposed. so now the chatter is automatically less.

Far less actually :)