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Originally Posted by shivatar
haha. it's good to see you again
i havent been logging on to SF in a while either. I might check it every few days but I havent posted a lot in the last 6 months or so. Been busy with life.
how have you been?
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I'm only coming on here for about an hour once a week myself, as things have slowed right down for me to almost a grinding halt and I'll only post if I see something really interesting (which is rare now).
Right now, I am studying Hermetics, the Kaballah and Sacred Alchemy and I haven't had a smoke of weed since I made that post above...possessing it is a crime worse than murder in this country.
I've come to the realisation that I am a 'Shadow Person' and I'm gaining full acceptance of that fact, as it is something beyond my control to change in any way and so, I am learning to live with it and existing 'in between dimensions' as it were.
I was studying the Great Arcanum today and it was talking about Tantra...it said "unless one has a partner, they cannot raise Kundalini" and I was calling 'bulls***' (as evidenced by all the great celibate and self-realised monks since time immemorial) and then I heard it "they didn't say that your 'partner' had to be flesh and bone, existing in this dimension, did they? so what am I then...chopped liver?"
Oh great, so I seem to be betrothed to one of the Elohim...but of course, we already knew that one, didn't we?
So, finding my own 'personal strengths' is difficult, but I am learning how to rely on and tap into the combined strength of Mortal AND Divine to make some kind of hybrid creature within me...as holding it back is destroying both aspects of my soul/psyche.
This is what I have been doing...how are you, by the way? my dear friend.
Aum Namah Shivaya