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Originally Posted by DARKEST_HOUR
Can you describe what you mean when you say "he's just gone" ? Like is he not in your head anymore of what? And how long have you been separated? In my situation she's still in the back of my head, but I'm mostly over the grieving part. Kind of like I got used to the fact that shes there, and someday I'm assuming it won't be there anymore or something. I don know I guess it's just my ego since I'm quite frankly fed up with everything. Just the other day I was asking myself what would I do if she called me out of the blue and told me she wanted to see me?? In a way im kind of scared of seeing her because I don't know what to expect and I don't even know if I'm ready.....Everything just feels ruined cause of this separation, does anybody else feel this way?
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I have grown accustomed to feeling as if he is sitting next to me all the time... and the past two weeks I just haven't felt that. As if the switch labeled HIM has been flipped to OFF. We've been apart almost 3 months.
For my own weird reasons, I have been thinking about what if he just calls out the blue too. I'm fairly terrified myself. I know it will be wonderful.. but only after a very uncomfortable conversation that must occur to clear the air before we could proceed. I very much want to have that conversation, but I am still scared of it.
I don't feel like everything has been ruined because of our separation, way too much purpose for it has become apparent since then. But I still miss him to bits and am weary of this!