Chuck Norris doesn't sleep; he waits.

Chuck Norris doesn't need a watch; he knows what time it is

When Chuck Norris swims, he doesn't get wet - water gets Chuck Norris.

When the Boogieman goes to sleep at night he checks underneath his bed for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse-kicked someone so hard his shoe flew off, broke the space-time barrier and hit Amelia Earhart as she was flying over the Pacific.