Quote:
|
Originally Posted by PlatitudePluto
Thanks, Michelle,
Yes, my mother is definitely like that. Talking to her often puts me in a bad mood and makes me doubt myself and most of the time I feel like she is just waiting for the chance to attack.
Also, I have a job that has no respect whatsoever for my time. I'm working six days a week with at most ten hours between shifts and have had no time to do the most miniscule things that have to be done outside work. Forget my hobbies.
Before last week, I was working seven days a week. Add to that on my days/times off my phone rings nonstop for people wanting me to cover their shifts.
My mother hassles me about finding another job but yet tells me I "can't quit this one", like she has any idea of my financial status. I finally snapped at her last week and told her "I'll decide that for myself" about quitting. I'm really thinking about it. I just changed cities, my COL is a lot lower than it was, and I don't want to lose the money but I don't know how much longer I can go on like this. I just started two months ago and am already burnt out.
Of course there is a manager there, ten years younger than me who is driving me up a wall. She's a manipulator and is one of those people who stirs people up just for the fun of it. She looks like a little witch, let alone acts like one. I'm not sure how I'm going to deal with her yet, but yes I've got some choices to make.
|
It does sound as though you have a lot of controlling people in your life. The thing to remember is that you don't have to respond to everyone the way they see fit. Start focusing on what you see fit for yourself, even if that means telling someone that you won't cover their shift if it gives you a much needed break. When we conform to everyone else and their wishes we lose our autonomy and feel like a puppet to life. Your mother and coworkers aside, your manager sounds like a really difficult person. Just try to remember that how they treat you is not a reflection of you as a person. They may play games as a way to feel more in control and more powerful over others but that just shows that they feel powerless themselves or they would not feel the need to manipulate others. Once you start to take back your power by deciding for yourself what is best for you then others won't be a threat to your well being and won't be able to push you around. So even though it may have felt wrong it was good you told your mother that you will decide for yourself. It's your life to live. It sounds like you are ready to live it for you. Once you do the threatening dreams will subside.