here is a good website that speaks about the witnessed state http://www.kundalini-teacher.com/chakras/witness.php dont avoid the problem just think about the pain wile detaching from the emotion, not feelings, these are different from emotion. An emotion is in our memory banks attached to an event that causes blind spots over our eyes. a feeling is pure. with pain we should analyze it and come to a true understanding of why we may feel think or act in a negative way. the truth will set you free. this practice helped me more than i could say, we truly do have the capability to control our mind. i recommend the movie ''What the bleep, down the rabbit hole'' it helped me start this practice. This is a heavy documentary/movie about quantum theory and it will take a few watches to understand.