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Thank you both, Iamthat and OEN. I really connected with what you both said. I guess I thought I had dealt with things from all the years I spent in therapy. And while those years were certainly not wasted, I simply didn't expect such a surge of emotion. I wasn't even aware that it was to be expected and was ok. Nobody ever seems to tell you that it may happen when they tell you to try meditation.
I also never experienced anything like that with candle meditation, but then candle meditation was simply to relax and a way to calm anxieties. It wasn't like I went deep with it, that wasn't what I was attempting back then. But it makes complete sense that with deeper meditation that there would be a release. After all, if a box is filled with dirt and you shine a light into it, the light won't go past the top layer. In order to fill the box with light you need to first empty it.
I really like that quote- "you can only heal what you can feel". I think I'm going to put that on a few post its here and there as a reminder.
Is there any specific guided meditation you can recommend? I have been using Joe T. On YouTube. I really like his guided meditation to connect with your spirit guide. While I am not yet near clear enough for that at this time, I'm really able to feel the stone and smell the river. It all just seems to connect with me, maybe since I'm such a nature person, maybe because I love water and am a water sign, or maybe it's simply his voice and style. But I'm not reserving myself to just that. I feel I need to explore a bit more. So if anyone has any recommendations, I'd love to try them out.
Thank you again!
With peace, love and light,
~Ais
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