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Old 07-03-2018, 12:33 PM
ohno22 ohno22 is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 6
 
Dreams about abusive ex

I'm really disturbed by these dreams. Nothing special happens in them, except my ex is in them. He is just there.

We were in a very unhealthy relationship and I ended it three years ago. Honestly, it is so over between us, because he was very abusive to me. We are in no contact and there is nothing in this world that would make me to speak to him ever again. He represents everything I don't want in life. Zero.

Despite having such attitude towards him, I have forgiven him and would be glad if he got mentally healthy. In reality, he is just getting worse.

So, why do I dream about him? I had dozens of such dreams where he wants something with me, either friendship, either more, and I just stand still and say nothing. In most dreams I don't even look at him and I run away from him or keep distance. I ask myself in my dream why is this happening and how come he is here? It just doesn't make sense.

These dreams are not nightmares, and I feel neutral in them, although I have negative opinion about him in dreams as in real life too.

Obviously, subconsciously, I want nothing with him, otherwise we would be doing things in dreams, right? Consciously, I'm done with him long ago.

When I wake up, I feel agitated and resentful about what I dreamt, because I don't want to have such dreams, I don't want to spent any time or energy on him. I feel invaded. Why would my mind create such dream?

I would understand if I had hidden feelings or wishes about him and me, but I don't. Honestly, I if found out he died, I would feel the same as for a complete stranger.

This has been going on for over a year. Can anyone suggest what can I do about it to make it stop? Why do I have those dreams? What is the meaning?
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