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I am so sorry that you still feel grief at the passing over of your dad. However, it is easy for "little things" such as a casual conversation or some memento to act as a reminder of happy times with a loved one. In my father's case, if I heard a piece of Glenn Miller music (of which he was an avid fan), then it would make me emotional. These things can take years to settle down.
Ultimately, however, the best way to put things into perspective is to remember that your loved one has not "gone away" never to be seen again, but is rather in a different dimension, and indeed can be contacted if you wish. Just send him your love and he will surely sense it. Think of it like phoning a relative in a distant country! You will meet again, in due course.
You said above, " I don't know if the wrench is because it's a human condition of grief, or if he's trying to reach me and I can't hear him.". Either or both of those could apply in your case. Some people take longer than others to recover from the passing of a loved one. There are no "rules" for length of time to regain composure. As for whether he is trying to contact you, that is of course possible. If you are still thinking about him often, or see him in dreams, then perhaps that his way of trying to contact you to say, "It's OK, I'm fine now".
Every best wish to you!
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