View Single Post
  #26  
Old 30-01-2018, 12:53 AM
pluralone pluralone is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 222
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by hellabomer
I choose to put the entire blame on myself by nitpicking my flaws and pinpointing my weaknesses. It's much easier that way. Simply because my mind is able to rationalize that, but not the sudden harshness of someone I love.
Quite a telling word there, "choose". Yes it can be a choice, but when one is unaware of other options is it really? The great thing here is that now you recognize your other options. For me, turning my anger or other hurt feelings in on myself is easier than feeling angry at the other person. It's been years since I recognized the other options available to me (like not throwing stones at myself just because I can't throw them at someone else), but I'd done that for so long it had become a thinking 'habit', a solid route in my brain along which such things always proceeded. Changing routes is difficult (understatement), and at times I still catch myself throwing stones at me.

It's a process. =-)

My point: If/when you catch yourself returning to old thinking habits, please be gentle with yourself as you adjust course. It's hard enough to do without being angry at oneself whenever a mistake is made.
__________________
From time to time, I do consider that I might be mad. Like any self-respecting lunatic, however, I am always quick to dismiss any doubts about my sanity.
- Odd Thomas
Reply With Quote