Now you've got me doing it.

Oops, sorry. I quite like Allan Watts and I've resonated with a lot of his material, and to me he's a slightly different kind of Matt Khan - a little more high-brow and crusty but he has his moments too. Watts has more of an air of authority as though it's the Universe itself that's talking, while Matt's more of a buddy I'm having a beer with.

I think we all need some kind of acknowledgement in some form or another, it's nice when the Universe says "Hey kiddo, you're getting there." It's kind of important to me right now, admittedly, because I want to know that I'm not going crazy and that my head is on some kind of straight regardless of how far out of mainstream I seem to be. It's kinda cool that the Universe is reflecting back at me and that we're finally coming to terms with each other.

Words have power, not just codes. "Change the words, change the paradigm."

I don't worry too much about the ego, although in a self-awareness way I'm much like you in that I have a lack of worth - even to the point of denying what's in front of my face. Personally I'd define ego as a reference point for our conscious experience, the simpler the starting point the better. According to Jung (or was it Freud?) it's a sense of 'I Am'. That works too.

I'm not a fan of coincidences, but that's interesting just the same.

Thank you. It kind of goes back to the question of what you're trying to heal and the reasons - and just to let you know that we have something else in common.

I tend to look for ways to turn things around and when 'negative' and 'toxic' become choices of perspective everything changes, they become dichotomies or contrasts. We go through our own traumas and if that makes us survivors or victims is up to us, but what we have to remember is that we somehow managed to come through it. True empathy only comes from having a similar experience and empathy is something that isn't exclusive to the Spiritually Advanced. Non-Spiritual people can tell the difference between true empathy or otherwise. Turning hurts into halos.

What we resist persists and the more things are suppressed the harder they fight back, as if they're fighting to reach the light of day. We don't need them, they make us feel bad yet we hold onto them as though they belong to us. Emotions are strange things and people are even stranger. Emotions are energy in motion, they're our 'reaction' to the flow of energy. What you're doing is clearing out some of the old energies so death warmed over is as good a way to put it as any, because there's a kind of mini death/reincarnation thing happening with you. Both your consciousness and your energetic frequencies are changing, as signified by you resonating with Matt's material and manifesting those changes into reality. The manifesting into reality is the energetic part of it. so the changes in frequency is understandably knocking your energetic body a little sideways. Your minor worries are the focus of your being aware that things are changing inside you, a kind of highlight if you like. The unsettled, tearful and anxious are the emotional responses to the energetic changes, they're just how you sense the different frequencies. Worry is often uncertainty and not being quite sure of what's going on, or if you're a control freak it could be feeling a loss of control. Certainly it's indicative of being at odds with yourself - which is kinda what is actually happening because a 'new you' is coming through that you're not quite comfortable with yet.

By all means allow the worry into the light, it's an indication that you're changing so you can celebrate it if you like. Suppressing it, though, means stagnation.

I was really ticked when they'd left Tom Bombadill out of the film because I really wanted to know what they'd make of him for some reason. He was a very mysterious character and there was more to him than met the eye. Still though, 'awe' would be the word to use. I still have the cinema tickets, Mrs G and my two daughters were with me. Yes. there was a lot of wisdom and so much food for thought. Being honest I found more Spirituality in LOTR than I've found in many Spiritual books. but then to me it's more about the Journey and not the theories.

The words on the white journal will come to you when you're ready, it's just not the time as yet so relax and don't let things irritate you. Allow it to be so. Have you thought about what the symbolism means to you, personally?

Books and writing have a very special significance to me, one that would need quite a lengthy tale to tell. The avatar is a nod to not just the writer but to so much connected with him. My daughter gave me a leather-bound notebook for father's day and that has quite a bit of synchronicity around it because it feels as though I've been given a clean slate, and what will be written on the pages is up to me for a change. No dictation any more.

I don't know why this is relevant, but.... I'm listening to Joe Satriani, arguably one of the greatest rock guitarists on the planet. In my mind's eye I can see a dark area with a single spotlight shining on a young boy, he's playing air guitar to the music. One of my 'Spirit kids'. There's a huge lump in my throat and the tears are welling up, the track is "Crying". I've had to pause a few times as I write this last bit, just to compose myself and now the track "Always with me, always with you" is fading away.