Thread: lost
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Old 24-03-2018, 12:26 AM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 7,062
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Maybe you are suppressing and not surrendering. There's a thin line...
I thought for a while I was surrendering, but I wasn't. I was blocking it. Suppressing it. I realized when I got physical problems due to stress (from suppressing it).
I'm now doing quite well at surrendering, since a week. It feels different. Relief. No stress. It's truly accepting that it's okay the way it is.
The feeling 'nothing' is what you get when you are suppressing. Not healthy. It means you are closing yourself off, not just from them / the connection, but from everything.
You have to allow the connection to be there, but not want it anymore, not need it anymore. Not need to have them in your life, not need to be in touch with them, yet be okay with there being a connection. Trusting that if it is meant to be, it will be.
I also thought I was surrendering for weeks, but my body and well-being made clear I wasn't. And when you are more detached and closer to surrendering, you will feel different. You will feel. But the connection or your TF just isn't all that important anymore.
I couldn't even be bothered to reply to his last message, while until a week ago I'd get all nervous and happy at the same time whenever I heard from him. Constantly hoping I'd hear from him etc etc.
Then when I got that last message, some 3-4 days after I'd send a message to him, I read it and shrugged. Didn't feel that pull, that urge, anymore. The bond is still there, but the pressure's gone.
I hope it is lasting, cos I was getting seriously fed up -and desperate at times- about not being able to let go.

BEst thing I did that helped... stop reading so much about it, stop doing/watching readings online about it or drawing cards on it yourself and stop reading and posting in here. When you do all that, you keep it active in your system because you're busy with it 24/7.
I don't often come here anymore. Done me a world of good. Get your mind of all that TF talk and live your life. Focus on other things.
It's like flicking a switch. I didn't want it anymore because my health was suffering. I started to clench my teeth at night for weeks on end. Resulted in 2 root canals and a E650 dentist bill.
My tinnitus got out of control, cramped shoulders, back & neck problems because of thinking and stressing over this TF breakup and chit. I was fed up with it.
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