thank you nightowl, i never knew that about Judiasm and the old testament, If Jesus was Jewish surely he believed the same?

I have been reading the Jesus Papers by Michael Baigent which has helped me a little it shows how the historical Jesus is is not the Jesus which Islam or Christianity portrays.

It also contains a part about Saint Therese a Catholic mystic who showed that the afterlife is not what the Church teaches but she lived in fear of the inquisition and the church wanted to continue with their monopoly and control over what was the 'truth'.

I dont know what to do, I also have an anxiety disorder so that doesnt help with my worry