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Hi space8Y, your post made me think of the guy who goes to his psychiatrist and tells him his problem......every time he goes in to see his boss he pees in his pants and gets terribly embarrassed, The psychiatrist gives him a few things to try and asks him to come back the following week. The next week the guy goes back and says "I'm cured. Thanks!" The psychiatrist says "great! so you no longer wet your pants." "Oh no, I still wet my pants but I'm no longer embarrassed about it!"
This might be a joke, yet it does hold a certain truth. Some things never change, or at least never seem to, but often its our emotional reactions that cause the problems. "Acceptance" is just a word but just the word can tangle us up..........trying to "accept" in order to eliminate an unwanted state of mind is NOT acceptance at all. Its like trying to pull ourselves up by our boot straps.
I'm a terribly judgemental person. I don't like it. But it never seems to change. But there is a world of difference between acting upon a judgement and merely observing that a judgement has been made. And sometimes, yes, when a certain moment has passed and looking back I recognise that then I never made a judgement when perhaps I may have done once, so called "progress" may have been made. But once again, just observe it and move on. To congratulate myself would be to consolidate a sense of a "self" that "makes progress" - something I know to be the heart of the whole problem.
Its all a tangle. But I just walk on, say "thank you", and let it all go.
All the best
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