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Interesting thoughts to ponder and I often wonder the same.
I did move on from him decades ago when I knew he would always be with some other woman. Those relationships never lasted for him.
My life during those decades apart was easier and more relaxed. I dated, had a relationship, BUT something was always lacking. I cared about those men, wanted to be with them, but I never felt for anyone what I feel for my twin.
I did not hold on waiting for him, I never expected him to be back in my life. Yet here he is again and life is no longer as relaxed or easy.
I live my life for me now, what makes me happy. If I find someone I want to date, I do. I aspire to things I want. But he's here in my life now. We talk, we see each other, we both know we have a special bond.
I do wish I could live a "normal" life. I wish I did not have him stuck in my head 24/7. I wish I did not connect telepathically. But this is what I am dealt and so I am learning to live with this, to be happy with his friendship only, try to be happy for him in his relationship.
I know to people who have not experienced this, have not known this love, it can not be understood. I cannot imagine anyone actually wanting this in their life.
Hugs to you as well.
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