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I am enjoying these responses, and I appreciate them greatly. I am drawn to your response, sandybythesea, because it resonates with what I have felt to be the true nature of the afterlife and our connection to it as we travel on this side of the veil. The most reassuring part is that we do indeed have a soul group, or family, that we travel with throughout time. I often lose sight of this, and feel like my tie to Matt is severed, or else severely strained by this sense of distance I feel.
I also like how psychoslice pointed out that souls do freely choose to come here, so there are desires to come here, which means that this world holds its joys, too, and souls want to come here and learn. We came here by choice, so we wanted this adventure, and we wanted to meet the people that we did. That is a good feeling.
I don't feel like I am moving on from Matt---I can't move on from someone I love, but I can live on, as hard as it is sometimes. Matt is still so much a part of me. I'm just not ready to think about other relationships--I am not trying to doom myself to a life of loneliness, but right now it is very difficult to imagine giving my heart to someone else. It hurts intensely to think about this, because I love Matt so much, and I think it is even more difficult because we didn't get a chance to say goodbye...So much unfinished business, as you would call it. My heart hurts so much......But I do think it is slowly healing........a little bit each day.
Although lately, as the year anniversary of his death approaches, the pain seems to be intensifying.
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