Quote:
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Originally Posted by django
Lately I’ve been getting angry more easily, blowing up at the drop of a hat, like the straw that broke the camels back is every single thing happening around me, and I lose it every time. It certainly doesn’t look very spiritually accomplished, and yet I’ve been working so hard for so long at this spiritual journey. The only hope I have is that this is just a phase, that the anger was being suppressed before, or not clearly perceived and acknowledged, and how can I heal if I don’t take off the anger brakes at some point?
I found this online, someone describing this sort of thing, and she seems to put it more clearly than me:
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You are being challenged by the Universe...by the very spiritual progress that you have attained and the more you attain, the more you'll be challenged until you realise just to let it all go...just be aware of it and not react to it, because that's the test. To surrender...relinquish whatever 'control' you believe to have over any given situation.
It takes a lot to get me angry...little frustrations that just add up and add up...at first, I pay it no heed, resting in my 'inner peace'...then these 'demons' (if you'd like to label it as such) try a different tact and approach to annoy me...I pay it no heed, resting in my 'inner peace'...but after like the fiftieth time, I explode
BIG TIME...there's only so much I can take.
Mostly it happens because we have been ignoring signs given to us when we KNOW they are there, what the Universe is saying and what it means, but we choose to ignore it because it is 'inconvenient' or we are trying to 'exert our own will' or because we think we just know better than God in a total act of egoic hubris...and then, my friend, the annoyance becomes relentless until you give up and say "okay, you win...kill me...see if I care!"
I posted a story about this online yesterday as I was totally ropable at God, but that NEEDED to happen so that I could love Him more:
http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/sh...6&postcount=18
You may understand it now and yes, still on the internet. lol