Also, I've been suicidal. I live with PTSD and recurrent major depression, and it's not always a bunch of fun, although I do pretty well 90% of the time. 90% of the time you wouldn't know this by looking at me. I have an advanced degree, held down a job for 30 years, and raised three kids.

So, having BEEN suicidal, I know (speaking for myself only) that if I had succeeded it would have been tragic for me and my family, because I didn't really want to die, I wanted relief from horrific flashbacks and a debilitating emotional condition.

So I'm all for sticking it out. Tomorrow is another day. Nothing lasts forever. This too shall pass. And so forth.

If necessary, ask for help until you get it.