|
I see, yes I am ready I don't want to waste any more of my life not living it to the fullest because of past conditioning. I do find it hard to deal with the hurt, I feel like I don't want to feel it anymore, but I understand I need to with open eyes, mind & heart to understand so I can move on from it. I understand what you are saying, I need to stop avoiding this hurt as that's what is holding me back, and let it come over me more to wash away instead of instantly trying to feel better. I realised when I listened to the inner thoughts as you describe, that when I get upset and offended if Matt isn't spending as much time with me as I'd like, I feel he doesn't like me or whatever, that's from my past feelings with my mum. I'll definitely focus on this for the foreseeable future and hope that it will make that last & final changes I have wanted for so long. I know deep down that not getting to the deepest parts of how I think & feel is what's been preventing this change, so thank you for bringing all of this to my attention.
|