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Yes, I see what you are saying. And while I'm all for kinky fun time, that is just the icing on the cake. Even sex is just a tool (wonderful amazing tool) to get to a deeper connection. The one thing I can say about BDsm is that it's not something you have to create or stick to in order to fulfil a role. You're either drawn to it or you're not. Period. As I said before, I was drawn to it but never found the right one until after I left. But even then a full time relationship would not be what I want. I just like a strong man.
So here's my concern... From what I've been shown about the Sacred Union is the exact opposite of controlling one another. These fun ideas that make intimacy more exhilarating are like playing dress up to the higher understanding of Union. The only surrender you make is to break with the attachments that keep you from meeting with your higher self. Completing the Union within yourself THEN joining with your twin. There is no room for creating a set of rules when God/Jesus/ the Universe is involved. And of course the masculine and feminine are not equal in the same ways. They fill the holes at the other one leaves. But the sacred feminine that's Awakening right now is far more powerful yet slower to react then the masculine. Others May experience it differently but historically that is why the feminine has been suppressed. Ultimately meaning submitting is not something the feminine can do while it's regaining power, if ever.
There is also some caution with the dark side taking aim at TF and soulmate individuals. It's really important to protect and ground yourself. Like SUPER important. There are many ways to do it but I create a magic circle (something I was taught) and do some protection prayers. EVERY. NIGHT. The attacks have been a lot less but now I can feel it when they come in.
I also do a 'Calling Upon' with Archangel Michael to come down and protect me with his flaming sword. I did this a lot early on and it helped. Tell him to remove all dark energies and entities attached to you or your home.
Doing a sage cleaning is super effective and should be done once a week in the beginning. Sage sticks are found it at most natural stores and instructions on the internet.
Protective grounding stones like black onyx and smoky quartz are now apart of my daily jewelry.
The TF connection is more to do with us raising the vibrations on the planet and we do that by knowing and loving ourselves. One thing that made me cringe inside was his "knowing you better". That is not cool for anyone to say that to you. EVER. You are not going through this alone.
And just so you know, everyone's Kundalini is being activated. It's how the planet is ascending and, yes, it's super confusing and intense. For twins it opens us up to even more attacks.
If I were you, I'd ask him to stay away from you for a while. Start meditating and ask for assistance from your guilds. They can be hard to hear in the beginning so try to get rid of distractions. You need the space from him to know your own mind. Being in service to yourself and spread love and light to all that you come into contact with. I know it sounds horrible and it just about killed me when I get it but it was the strongest thing I've ever done and I'm so much better off for it.
When you are ready he will come again and you won't feel trapped or this uncertainty. Some TF won't come into Union for a long while so loving yourself is really important. It sounds like he needs to do a lot of healing on himself before he deserves you.
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