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Originally Posted by ohno22
Thank you.
I've forgiven myself long time ago. I didn't do anything wrong. There is nothing to forgive. I allowed that relationship and I got out when I decided enough is enough. I don't feel guilty at all.
Having judgements is protecting me. Every time I used to put down my guard he would use it against me and try to infiltrate back to my life. He is not in my life anymore, but I do see him from time to time in certain occasions due to work. It's complicated. We don't talk thought and I pretend he's a ghost. So, how do I let go of judgements?
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it's sounding like you're coping well in waking life, and that you have a
level-headed perspective on your situation. they say "once bitten, twice
shy", and you seem to have good cause for being reluctant to allow the
abuse to return. i believe it to be wisdom which recognizes that you've
done no wrongs, and that you've got nothing to forgive yourself for.
to release judgments, i'd suggest replacing it with 'discernment', guided
by the wisdom of a loving heart. i view love as the universal panacea for
all ills, though i haven't seen it demonstrated as effective in curing physical
injuries. i imagine love to be the energy of life, provided to all of creation.
the thing about judgments (in a nonlegal/non-mundane sense) is that they
place limitations on the judge, not on anything else... who would freely
choose to be non-free? [to place judgments implies a non-free choice,
meaning no choice at all.]