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Sounds like you have had a rough time, Coolchic. Bless you. You are talking to the right person if you are talking directly to god. We cannot `change` our souls, our soul is simply a part of our spiritual make up, it might be better to ask the divine to help you on a human level to bear the karma you are currently enduring. Such as they are; you have my blessings. As I said earlier it sounds like you have been thru a torrid time, the others above seem to have ignored this. No wonder you are upset and seek a positive change. Keep offering it up to god, he will help.
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