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I like to believe that there is someone out there for everyone as after all, we all have many soul mates.
I've been single for a very long time now (well I kind of see someone but he is not really there for me at all and our relationship is more about a relationship which meets of my care needs as a person with a severe disability when he has time. We are not in a proper relationship, he never stays the night or has even time to do something fun like watch a movie with me. I'm like a person that I think he feels obliged to help occasionally as I really do not have anyone else).
I was fine with being single for quite a long time with the belief that the right person will come along when the time is right but its been so long that this situation is now becoming emotionally painful to me as I'm going through a life with no one to share it with. No one to laugh with, play with or have fun with.
I have got children who are grown up but it's been a couple of years since I've seen them or my grandchildren. My loneliness is truely awful and being severely disabled I can not get out by myself and meet people or see people.
I often think that when the day comes when I die, I could end up being like one of those situations one reads about where the person is left dead for months before anyone realises I'm gone.
I can't believe my path is supposed to be like this. (Those dating sites are awful. Most of the guys are married and just looking for sex and when I was using them three times I found myself in distance relationships which after I year I found out I was being lied too and the guys were not as they had lead me to believe.
One vanished on me the moment I got a passport to go and see him after we talked about me doing so for a year and I was so excited that i was soon to see him, while another one after a year I went overseas and paid him a surprise visit, only to find out that the whole idea of me was only just a fantasy thing to him. (he was still overly involved with his ex-wife among other things).
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