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Hi Crowzie. I agree very much that now is the time for you to pay attention to you. Though I realize it must be really hard living with her.
So, first I'd work on getting out of there, immediately. However you do it, leave. Because as long as you are there, your heart is going to be drawn to her. You were with her far too long for anything otherwise to happen.
After you are away from here you then can focus on all the other things you need to do much easier. I would still do your best while you are there, but realize it will probably be a challenge, which is understandable. Don't be too hard on yourself for that, feelings are what they are. Try to accept that you feel for her. Just move on from here.
Wishing you the best.
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