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It's not important if you don't feel her around you, it's all in perception. She can't help but be around you because you are a part of each other and always will be. Sometimes we're so close to someone, that not sensing them around you is the key to bringing out your own unique strengths, talents, what-have-you. You're absolutely right in that there are various ways to approach spirituality.
It's very touching to hear your mom spoke to the birds. People in my family did that too. Both sides, surprisingly enough and both sides very appreciative and had an affinity for birds, bees, flowers, trees, etc.
Each dream you may have had in the past about her is important. I've only had 2 dreams about my son (3-3-87 ~ 2-14-10). But the symbolism and feelings during the dream and the messages are key to my ability to pick up the pieces and carry on in a way that will make him proud and know that I'm doing as the great spirit would want.
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