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Old 08-02-2012, 01:22 PM
Medium_Laura
Posts: n/a
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sungirl
Hiya

Although I know other systems are as effective I really want to know about bach as that is the set that I have.

I am in a situation at work that is quite difficult but I know that I am not helping and I want to get over my side of the problem in the hope that if I change then the other person will have to change.

Please don't have a go at me for this, I know I am wrong and I am trying to work on it, but I also need to be gentle with me as I am prone to being very angry with myself.

This is the situation.

4 years ago I was given a job that was brand new for the company I work for. No-one else had done it and the hand over from the person who was doing it before was very limited. This means I have created almost all the systems.

When I first started I was terrified of the job and I fought through that fear to become very good at the job and quite confident.

3 years ago they brought someone in to "help" me but she refused to work using the systems and it was a nightmare... she left and I was hoping that her replacement would be better.... but although she uses the systems she is a nightmare in different ways.

Now I know I can't do anything about her, she is who she is. I need to work on my responses to the way she is.

The response I am most ashamed of (yes I am taking crab apple) is that I get all bristly whenever she does anything. I'm guessing it's jealousy. Ultimately I don't want any "help", I want to be left alone to get on with the job. I'm quite capable. It's very much a "get off, it's mine!!" response.

This has got to stop, it's making me unhappy having someone interfering with my "baby"... and that is not healthy. I need to learn to share.

I am thinking Holly would be the remedy for this, but I thought I had tried that and it didn't work... so maybe it's the wrong one.

I'm too close to this to work it out myself.... what do other people think??


Bach is great but you also have to work on your ego. It's not jealousy so much as envy. You envy that she is on something that belongs to you. Though you hired her to help, you really don't want the help. You feel you can do it better.

I am in no way judging you. You are not much different that 80% of mankind, but the fact that you KNOW you want to change is the good part! :)

Read the book "A new earth" by Eckhart Tolle (the audio was nice as I listened to it in my car) It talks about ego and why our ego gets out of control and how to "observe" it and make changes. We will never "get rid" of our ego as it is necessary and sometimes helpful to us.

Buddhism is also another avenue. It is a way of life, not a religion. My husband is Buddhist and has really helped me a lot with my ego/competitive issues. I now border on the other side of balance LOL. It's not easy, but it is possible :) Wish you the best :)
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