I think a lot of the posts I've read people are mistaking severe obsession for being soulmates or twin flames. Posts that talk about the TF ignoring them in real life, dating others. That's not a two way connection if you ask me. Also people always insisting upon equating a TF relationship with a romance and totally ignoring the fact that the TF connection can exist as other things too. That thinking it's being in love with love, I think.

I think it's easy enough to mistake obsession and attraction for this. Having been there myself, having seen a couple of dear friends going there to their near destruction I don't encourage anyone to go there unless there are clear signs of it being a two way connection, and by that I don't mean just feeling or hearing the other person in your mind telling you it is so. I mean the other person is actively pursuing the connection connecting with you in the real word, interacting with you verbally and telling you they feel the same way.

The heart can fool. The body can fool. Hormones can do crazy things to your head, make you think crazy things are true. Particularly when you are young and desperately want to find your TF. Step back, vet yourself and your behavior. Don't assume anything, do your best to think clearly, and wait for the other person to indicate to you that they feel the same way.

I can tell you from personal experience that just because you think you may have found the TF doesn't mean anything romantic will come of it. Sometimes you're just ships passing in the night and that's okay because in some lives that's what you need to be. You need time to work on personal growth in a way that doesn't necessarily include them. Tell this to a person who is obsessed and they will argue that can't be till their are blue in the face. Their so called "TF" could be totally ignoring them, completely unaware of them in the real world, and they would still think so.

My one friend that was obsessed she would insist that she and the person she wanted were TF. In her head they had this whole astral life together and she passionately hated his real life wife of many years because she felt that this woman was keeping her from him. In reality his wife was very much his TF, it was obvious he adored her and even today some 50 odd years later their marriage is rock solid. I haven't seen that friend in many years but I have no doubt that she is still obsessing and telling herself that she and this man are TF's and meant to be. They're clearly not but in her mind and heart she just cannot see that. He is her one true love, her soulmate/TF and anyone that interferes with that connection is the enemy.

You can be fooled by your own emotions into thinking someone is your TF. You cannot just trust yourself to decide if someone is or not. You cannot trust what's going on in your head. If it's real, the other person will interact with you, in the real world, and they will let you know. If it's only in your head? Then you need to keep steady and wait and see. Don't do what my friend did. Ultimately it cost her her sanity, her friends, and in some ways her reputation. What was going in in her inner life it was very bad for her in real life, but she was 100% convinced that she was right that this guy was her TF and that they were meant to be. Probably still is, shrug...