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Originally Posted by peacemaker
There was a time when I used to meditate daily.I have had spiritual experiences which normal can not even think of.I used to play with energy all day in my body.I was able to awaken any moment at my will.I could arouse Kundalini any time I wanted in my spine.
Now I have lost everything.It started with the thought that these these things has no meaning in my life.In life enlightenment is the only thing we should have.I slowly left all my practices day by day.
Now I am very big alcoholic.I was never a successful social and professional person.Now I am not even a spiritual person.
I don`t understand what mistake did I commit?Is it because of my past life karmas?I dont know what path to follow.I dont know where is my teacher.
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Daily life is something you can't avoid. You pull up your roots to muddle through, as the universe is in such a state of flux right now. Everyone is evolving, changing, and to disconnect from the universal EEK-ness is sometimes your only escape to deal with your moments. It's happening a lot these days.
Maybe there isn't a set path for you to follow, and maybe you don't need a teacher. You are most certainly not being punished. Take a moment, not even meditating, just to close your eyes and feel the sway of the earth. It feels very turbulent. Think of white water rafting. You row the boat for the most part, oars int he water, influencing the water, the water influencing the boat(meditation). Then a class 5 section comes along, and you pull the oars up, let someone else row, and just hold on tight(right now). The water is throwing you around, affecting everything it touches. Soon you will come to a place where the water calms, and you can put those oars back in.