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Originally Posted by SierraNevadaStar
I am quite sick and tired of this connection. Things were once quite beautiful and awe-inspiring. Now they are just draining, confusing, unsettling, toxic and depressing; it makes me sad the turn things have taken, but it's the way of things, I guess.
I'm not even sure what is true anymore. Everything which seems to have manifested seems to be the opposite of what I was told - knew - to be true. A few years ago he could not stand the woman he would later marry. A few years ago, we were so close. A few years ago, it felt like we might've well ended up together in this lifetime.
Now I don't even know where I'm at, he's at, we're at. But what I do know is that it feels like hell.
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Hey there Sierra
Life is such a test and weirdly something you said here made me think about everything that has been happening in my life too. I am currently disconnecting from my karmic, and believe me, as much as I want to do this, the test of will inherent in what I have to do is rocking me a great deal.
I have relayed this story to you because you say:
Quote:
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Originally Posted by SierraNevadaStar
I am quite sick and tired of this connection. Things were once quite beautiful and awe-inspiring. Now they are just draining, confusing, unsettling, toxic and depressing; it makes me sad the turn things have taken, but it's the way of things, I guess.
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This is where I am too (of course things with my karmic were hell, not like I wanted to stay with him or anything, yet my feelings are similar to yours in general), I just want it to stop. To my mind and within what I have got to go through right now, the tiredness, the confusion, being unsettled - there is something that I am learning, despite wanting to run for the hills.
Maybe move into acceptance of the connection, acceptance of what it is that is happening for you. Currently I am writing everything down that upsets, phases me etc and I am letting it clear from me.
I think when we fall into these spaces where things go where they have gone, we are in a space of resistance without realising it and sometimes the resistance, the limbo, the space before everything is cleared can be really tough.
It is to keep thinking about what you want to feel. I would say decide on what you want to happen for you and make inroads to believing and feeling that. As for the dreams accept that your mind is so busy with these feelings that you are using night time to help yourself to clear what you no longer want in your life right now.
Trust, you will get there, you will be able to move round this and create an acceptance that helps you to move forward
