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Originally Posted by hellabomer
Yes, I am trying to accept everything; these uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. It is hard, of course. And I cry at night. But I know that if I manage to sit through this pain instead of distracting myself from it, something beautiful awaits at the end of this dark tunnel.
And I am going to work on self-love through some videos, books and meditation practices. It's the first time I want to fully give myself a chance to live. I have battled through depression for years, and I think it's high time that I should learn to embrace this physical existence. It's a long process though, and I am a little scared of the unknown, too.  |
You certainly have a healthy attitude, hellabomer. Good for you!
For what it's worth, one thing that helped me when I was first working on learning to love myself was this: Periodically throughout the day I'd take a good look at what I was thinking, what kinds of things I was saying to myself. Wow was I a nag! Lots of thoughts were going through my head that called into question my worth and insisted that I was unlovable. So I'd gently correct those thoughts and set my mind on something better.
At first the corrections I made didn't quite seem accurate - especially when I was correcting "I hate me" to "I love me" - but there was a deeper part of me that recognized the truth when I heard it, and the corrections I made also served to draw that part of me to the surface. It took a long time, but I went from having a deficit in self esteem to having a good, healthy sense of self love.
I still struggle with things - that's life - but at my core I love me. Quite the improvement over self loathing, and one bonus benefit is that I'm more capable of processing through the difficulties in my life because I'm not longer fighting with myself. That's huge.
I wish you a quick journey in learning self love, but even if it takes a long time it'll be well worth the effort. Please keep us posted as you proceed.