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Old 23-10-2017, 02:05 PM
Dude Dude is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: U.K.
Posts: 735
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Hi windbreeze...

First let me just rephrase your list!

You have freedom, have not rushed into committing to the wrong person, the world is pretty much your oyster as you have no commitments to concider

You finances aren’t being drained by having a car and the environment benefits from you using public transport, walking/ cycling etc. You also have the benefit of being able to actually take things in on your journeys... people go on wonderful drives and all they see is roads and cars, you get to take it in and enjoy the beauty around you

Neither do I and I’m older than you! It works well for me!

Ok so again no drains on finances, nothing tiying you down, I’m seeing a lot of things some would be quite envious of here!

Your only 34... be very careful about saying that’s old when I’m 2 years older!! :) It’s very easy to look at what others choose to show and think everybody is happy with a perfect life but that really isn’t the case! I’m sure some of those people will be envious of your life!

Your not alone and you have company! Even though being a career for someone or having someone dependent on you is very draining long term, it can affect relationships unfortunately but that’s quite natural. It’s a shame she can not get a career to give you a break, but don’t give up on trying. In the meantime you need to work on allowing yourself some me time.

I don’t mean any of that in an offensive way just how I see your list- none of that is shameful!

Now personally I think you should think about what little things you can do now to make things a bit easier. How do you feel about your business? Would it be better to get a new job if that paid more and was less stressful? Would the doctors be able to help with depression? Or would socialising more help? Getting out more for a change of scenery?

It’s wonderful your caring for your mom but you need to make sure your getting some balance and your taking the time to care for yourself too. I wonder what would happen if you didn’t go to an appointment with her- would they arrange for an interpreter? I have seen telephone ones used before here if there is nobody to translate. Maybe think about prioritising appointments and try missing a few of the less important ones and see how it goes. Maybe talk to the hospital and see what services they have to make appointments accessable, each country is different but there may even be help she can get with transport, you never know. Sometimes they don’t shout about these things as it’s cheaper and easier if people sort it themselves!

I think if you focus on yourself a little more and your own needs that would help quite a bit :)
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