Thread: I want to die.
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Old 26-07-2017, 01:53 AM
FallingLeaves FallingLeaves is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 6,413
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by H:O:R:A:C:E
i like what you've said.
imagine that i'm a "left-hander". the things i do are as a left-hander. then,
at some point, i get nerve damage and can't use my left hand very well
anymore... i need to use the right. suddenly, people start treating me as
a "right-hander", even though i know myself to be a lefty... just unable to
function that way presently. what i'm saying is that what other people
think or expect of me has nothing to do with my self defined identity.
i suppose the desire to be a female is different than the desire to
be treated as a female. the first is up to the individual (in my argument),
the second is up to 'the others' to determine. i just don't see how it's
possible to require that free-will beings act/behave in accordance to my
desires. i'd like for people to genuinely care for themselves, each other,
and the world -- but i can't force them to do so.

yeah and that is the main reason I don't reach for the shape shifting (although I've apparently done it before). I've been way way way down the road of trying to get others to treat me the way I want to be treated and really, it isn't a good road to be on.

And even this whole thing about 'i've got to have the right body so that people will treat me the right way' is just too much for me. It is very upsetting because I go to a lot of effort to get it, then it gets taken away again and I have to go to even more effort to get it back. When really I don't much like the trying to get it it is the having it that is what is desired.

right now I'm into letting go of stuff that just hurts... so... guess I just cant have what I want *shrugs*
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