Hi guys!

I found my way to this forum because I have a question, and I was hoping to get some opinions that require a bit of experience with meditation.

You see (and you can skip ahead to the last section in bold if you wish to just read the question, and not all the chatter), I know (by research) that meditation is supposed to be THE thing, to say it in short - it will help with a whole load of things. This is even a topic where science and spirituality actually agree, and it has even been shown that the brain actually physically changes when developing with meditation.

If this wasn't enough motivation for me to begin meditating regularly, then there's been a few additional motivational marks... Long story short, I've always been very interested in spiritually and the way of the world, but also very logical, scientific, and skeptic. So, for many years I've sought answers through several ways, one of which was the clairvoyant abilities of others. I have tried to use this to create "a picture" by holding together all the pieces from countless clairvoyance sessions of different sorts. For a long time this was just to see if there was indeed any coherency, but when I found that there was, it developed into investigating subjects such as what did I want - on a soul level - to achieve in this life. Okay, so actually a long story for just a little point; I have a gotten a lot of remarks in the line of this specific one: " you are also on something of a spiritual quest... I urge you to take up the practice of daily meditation - one of your goals is to "pierce the barriers of our limited consciousness," availing yourself of a Higher wisdom... meditation will help you pursue the spiritual quest you have set for yourself."

Okay, sorry for all the writing, but all in all plenty of motivation and cause to begin meditating, right? Problem is, I find it SO boring. Big deal! Plenty of things are boring, so get a grip! Achieving some form of higher insight actually sounds like some of the best I've ever heard, yet when I don't feel I have anything to latch on to, such as a small sign that something is happening, I can't, or maybe won't, stay motivated. The mind is a like a muscle, and it can be trained, with meditation, for instance. However, it is not quite like training a muscle, which I find more motivating because even though I knew when I started that it would take at least 4 sessions of 2 hours a week for 4 years to get where I wanted, I did it, gladly, because I could see and feel right away that I was going somewhere, whereas with meditation I feel I could go on for 2 hours a day for 50 years and possibly have achieved nothing but wasting my time.

Anyway, I have found no solution to this, but one idea emerged to do just a little without feeling that it's a daily burden added to the list of thing I have to overcome, though I don't really feel like it. Music...

So, really, my question is about the nature of meditation. I've found that some music makes my mind kinda go blank, and it's supposed to that under meditation anyway, right?. So, so far so good. Right now I have a specific piece in mind, as an example: "The Ecstasy of Gold". Now, I can't post URL, but for those who don't know it and are curious it's by Ennio Morricone, and can of course be found on You Tube :)

So this has no lyrics to "disturb" me or get me thinking. Good! And I think I could listen to this piece, or others that I like, for hours at a time. Also good! The thing is, however, it's not usually tranquility or stillness that is inspired here, but more a feeling of... Focus, sternness, power, energy, and goose bumps! I love it, and I notice how I automatically sit more straight and feel less tired and inclined to lose focus when I listen to it, and I think I could just stand straight and stare out my window at "nothing" for hours at a time listening to it.

But the question is, has this got anything to do with meditation at all? Is meditation stillness of thoughts only, or is it also a stillness of being, of emotions?

If your read all of this, that's good going, and if you have any helpful insight to any of it, then I greatly appreciate it!

Thanks for reading!


Martin