[Bonge]

I hope this is the right place to ask.

I am currently in between jobs, and so I have basically been living at home with my parents 24/7 for the past two months. I am desperately looking for a job, and intend to move to a different city as soon as I can find one.

My issue is that living with my parents is making me ill. My mother is a helicopter parent and projects her emotional issues onto me, she never learnt how to handle her own issues and also unfortunately didn't receive the best education in her home country, so I feel like there is this barrier that makes me unable to communicate to her.

My dad is an abuser, gets into fits of extreme rage over nothing and begins screaming like a demon to anybody he is in physical proximity to. He has been this way since I was a child. He is extremely negative and always puts everybody down, when I was like 10-12 he would have these bursts of rage at me whenever I was just being a kid. I would literally run away from him and he'd pick me up, slam me onto my bed and just start slapping me. When I was like 13 I was at home and experimenting with make up, he saw it and dragged me by the neck and started screaming that I look like a prostitute. He has honestly never done good for anybody.

Thankfully he isn't physical now that I am an adult. But the walls in our house are thin and I can still hear him screaming many times throughout the day. My dad doesn't work and so being exposed to his constant presence hurts me a lot, even if we don't talk or see each other all day. I feel like I am suffocating. I have no friends in this city, only bad memories. I want more than anything to leave but no job recruiters are getting back to me and all this talk of an upcoming recession just makes me even more scared that I'll have to spend even more time stuck in this house.

How can I spiritually protect myself from this awful energy that I am exposed to every single minute of the day?