Hi Izz, thank you! Glad you read through it all, sometimes I write too much. I try to practice, though to summon my thoughts more.

yes, I too learn that is quite a common "tradition" that you come from such a family, with that kind of abuse taking place "invisible" such, and then end up with a partner who pretty much looks like those who abused you in the first family. It's so wonderful you recognized it and then moved on from it.

I'm so sorry you had to deal with such a "romantic" partner yourself.

I agree, I think it is only those who has lived through it themselves that get it 100%, the rest only think they do, that they have an idea of it. Ignorance is dangerous. I used to be one of them myself, I think. Some mean well, and some, well, out of ignorance, they don't, even if they think they do. But then I think, well, it's not for them then - that knowledge, not this time around, it will get around to them sooner or later (perhaps in the after life, perhaps in a future life) and things I have to learn too myself, I bet, in other fields, though, in future ahead. I'm grateful for all the help I received when I was in trouble myself and I'm happy the few times I have been able to help someone else in real life, that the bad experience did result in something good in my hands, for someone else in need.

right back at ya :)