@Deb...I know, right, lol.... Story of my life!!! I'm that person who met a deceased relative I never knew I had through dreams, learned of my grandfathers death through a visit, saw my own future through visions....and I'm a hard core skeptic. I can only imagine what God, or my ancestors will have to say to me when I get back there. I wonder if they get mad....or cuss over there? Lol. Imswear one time, years ago...I was hot on the back of my head, and nobody was there.... It felt like somebody smacked me, not hard, but like someone was saying....listen! Was it them....lol
Even now, I read my post....and Im like...what freakin weirdo! It's actually liberating to be of deprecating at times, I feel like I'm not hiding things.
Yet, there's s truth on a soul level there, that makes us all weird as truth can not be touched, but only felt.
I just can't always maintain some kind of constant unshakable faith at times, these days...because it's not tangible, solid, touched, seen...you see, after my NDE, it felt like I was a new soul again. I felt I had been healed, I was on a spiritual high for years after that. It was like I was filled with this energy that I hadn't felt since I was first born. Through the years, and this life...it's slowly wore off, but yet, there is some kind of cord or connection where I still get "soft spoken messages" Not the blatant "in your face visions, dreams, and other abilities" I still have it, I think...I'm just not on that spiritual high, like I use to be.
What's really amazing though, and keeps me holding onto what I've experienced, through the years and the time that has passed, sometimes with no experiences for years...is that I can write a perfectly ethereal messed up post like this....and you guys get it....because it's real. Everything I've seen and experienced, especially after my NDE...was real.
It's feels as if I was in another completely alternate universe from then. . Those days, weeks, and years....I was floating through this spiritual high from that time. That's what it felt like after my NDE. I still ask questions, not sure if I'm blind by this reality these days...or I just feel abandoned at times.
It's been 15 years since that happen...and that time seems so magical to me now. Mainly because I'm back in reality...back to this lower level, in the real world again, trying to keep that faith(I still get glimpses of that level of spiritual insight these days, just far and few in between) I can only liken it to when we are small babies and toddlers, with so much energy...and as we get older, that energy, high, and protection wears off through life experiences.
It's hard here, even after so much I have experienced, as the years get further away from that time...I feel that time has slipped away. I have to remember and hold those memories and experiences close to me.
Everyday, before bed..I am buying iBooks online or surfing the web to read others experiences, their beliefs, and what's happened to them. Just reading their stories, brings all of it back for me again.
I have learned, nothing surprises me anymore. All of our experiences are glimpses into all of our spiritual paths. So when they speak of, or write their experiences....I am invited into their spirit for that moment...and for that moment...I am reliving my own again and again.
Thanks for reading, you guys. God Bless!