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Challenging! It reminds me of the movie "Michael" with John Travola. Battle! If you've never seen it, there is a battle scene in the movie that I find very funny - I won't give it away if you haven't.
You have hit the nail on the head.
How do we stay happy in a negative environment?
Funny thing about vibration - she either has to come up to your *newer* hopefully, happier vibration, or you have to come down to meet hers. It's something I have learned about vibration. However, there is an escape clause.
You don't have to stay in her negative environment.
We all have choices every day - and we are all creatures of habit.
You are used to dealing with each other in certain ways, due to habit.
There are a few things I would point out that may be helpful, and may not.
Chances are, you love your mother. Even though she aggravates you, and you think her unkind and greedy (I heard that LOL) underneath all the craziness is love.
Chances are, she loves you too. Even though you aggravate her, and she thinks you are unkind and greedy (goes both ways - people mirrors I call them) underneath all the craziness is love.
You guys can decide to work on your relationship or not. The Universe, in it's infinite wisdom, through you together again. So there must be some underlying reason, something stuck in the past that needs to be free - probably on both your parts.
As a mother of a grown *** daughter, I found myself living with her again after she graduated college. We had a very good, solid, sound relationship I always thought. Until I found out, we had some issues we had to work out.
Apparently I liked (hmmm...like...controlling situations) and apparently she does to, but she didn't like me controlling her situations!
Long story short, although our relationship was different, underneath we all have the same issues, really. It's called, learning how to have an adult relationship, and through overboard the past. And sometimes you find it is not even your past, it is your grandparents pasts, and their grandparents pasts. It's a crazy thing, but we were working through generational issues, that perpetuated themselves each generation.
I like to think we broke the curse LOL. But it took a lot of hard work, on both our parts, and acknowledging that we started from a place of love.
It also helped that her partner moved in with her, and my husband was around, so we had people to help us if we got too intense.
Emotions are intense. They sound like they are true. They feel like they are true. Until you get to the bottom of the emotion, and realize, it's just an emotion, it is not a truth.
My daughter and I had a great relationship, like I said. We had a lot in common. She is psychic, and hey, I loved psychics. It gave us some common ground to start upon and to help us remember that the basis of everything is love.
It is never about the money - just my 2 cents. It sounds likes its about the money, but it is not.
There comes a time in your life that you have to start teaching your parents. To respect you, and respect what you believe in, and to respect what you are doing with your life, and they don't get a vote. And they don't get to control your actions. So, I think that is a place to start.
That's where we started anyway.
My daughter is very gentle, very sensitive. I am not. I am take the bull by the horns and call a spade a spade. So we approached life very differently, but underneath the approach, while we are completely different, we share a lot of the same interests. But she taught me to be interested in what she was doing and learning and growing and that's also a good place to start.
It's hard to share yourself with another.
So, my tip would be: you can't care what your mother thinks about anything, it only matters what you think about it. She doesn't get a vote.
Now, you may not want to tell her that right away LOL, but you have to start thinking it and living it and doing your own thing and not caring what she thinks about it.
Parents are flexible. We can bend. It's when the children teach the parents that life comes full circle.
If you can find a middle ground, something that you both are interested in, that you both like to do, you might start there.
But really, just focus on doing your own thing and living your own life, and doing the best you can and getting happy and staying happy. And you will find, when you are happy and she is not, you won't see her much because your vibrations don't match up.
It takes time, so allow it to take some time and be easy with her - this is a really hard concept for some people, that their children can teach them about life. But it is amazing and you will be so glad that you got there someday.
Hope this helps!
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