EFT & releasing Co-dependency?
 

I love the way EFT has worked for me this year in releasing issues such as simple angers and hurts. Where I'm having trouble though is "releasing" complicated & old core feelings of co-dependency & feeling responsible for one of my parents from my childhood onwards, esp. now that that same parent actually DOES need me in old age!

My attemtps at EFT work somehow feels like abandoning them and my inner mind (reptilian or primal level?) is fighting it with a "NO I can't tap this, I can't do this, it's not right." I get memory images of that parent looking sad, bereft, and crestfallen even. Though I did have a click moment when the FASTER EFT guy Robert Smith said in a throwaway line "just send them love." I guess the trick is to allow the love to remain, while letting everything else go?

Has anyone else worked this angle w/ EFT? I've been doing a lot of google searchs for tapping on this issue but so far, no hits to help with the aiming of the tapping statements. Am a bit at a loss!

Thanks for any input.

I'm in the throws of something similar myself. It's in my nature to take the responsibility....

I have not heard of EFT until you mentioned it. I have issues with my mother who is also elderly and I am trying to accept the way things are, without rejection of myself. But it's not easy to have a mother who is detatched and not very loving.

Hi Sslama I hear you on your situation...and good for you for working through it. So many people just walk away

If you're interested in learning more, you can scroll down the main EFT thread page, you'll find a posting by Xan explaining what EFT is. The experts will explain it much better than I can, but basically it's like using acupressure on yr face and neck, to help you release old negativity & pains ~~ even aches and pains!

There's a lot on the web about it, and on youtube. Among many, I like a guy named Robert Smith. You see him "tapping" on a woman who witnessed a murder as a child and had been haunted ever since, to help her get over the memory ~~ not only do you see her get immediate release and relief, then there's a follow up a year later, and she'd lost like a hundred pounds and was this relaxed, smiling person!

That one is my favorite. Makes anything I've gone through seem kinda small in comparison, so it gives me hope, and I keep tapping. But I do have to find a way to stay present to my parent, without getting sucked into the chronic drama, distress, and dysfunction they're addicted to :S

I have Xan to thank for introducing EFT - even though at first I thought it sounded nutsy. I've been using it for almost a year, and I love it! Just - tap - on - what comes up, because it's for you - it's not going to change 'them' (except perhaps in how it changes / alters your attitude towards them). Keep up the good work, and just tap on what you said above.......I've been sticking with the basics, thus far.

Thanks you two....I am going to look into it further. I am trying so hard to not carry this negative baggage with me. It's not easy.

First step in EFT is being sure about what you want to clear.

Thanks. Gosh, nothing like short and simple for clarity :)

In my case then, I may try tapping on just being angry about being neglected & used as a drinking partner...

Yes.

Though it's a bit more genuine if you help your parents without feeling like you have to. :wink:

In fact, because of the Law of Attraction, you'll be manifesting them appearing needy.

Clearing stuff is probably why we're here (on planet Earth).

WHOA that is one scary thought that I could manifest them as needier haha thanks for the reguiding on that one :D I sure don't need them draining me more, at least, not until I've tapped and cleared out the years 1970 to oh, 1983!

so much better to be an adult than a kiddie dealing with this. And to have resources like the internet and SF. What a gift.