Forgiveness from the dead
 

Dear All,
Is it possible to seek forgiveness from the dead, particularly parents who have have passed away? Its not a question of about learning from one's mistake as those situations are unlikely to arise in my life again. But I regret that I made mistakes and I cant do anything about them except feel helpless.
Thanks

What you must understand is that on the Other Side your parents are in a realm of love, and they see things through spiritual eyes - in other words they can understand human reactions and human failings, so have a different perspective and fuller understanding of the what's and the why's.

I don't know what happened and I don't need to. I've no doubt they aren't blaming you for anything, probably wishing they had done things differently themselves if anything.

If you send them thoughts of love - and a 'sorry' if it will help you move on - they will receive them.

You remain their ambassador on earth and, the future being yours, you can do them proud.

Many thanks knightofalbion. I was very lucky to have loving parents. Most family dynamics are complicated anyway, I just didnt fit in so easily with my older siblings (age gap of 16-7 years). There was stuff that my parents didnt know happened to me as a kid and a teenager. I didnt want them to hurt. I struggled with depression and being a loner made it difficult. So I mostly stayed at uni or as far away from home, but I missed them terribly. I tried my best and had very big goals of working on inventing solar cells etc, except I got a bit derailed with alcohol and boyfriends. I led two lives and didnt tell my parents anything they didnt want to hear. I did remedy it later, in some ways, and so they were proud of me. However, I feel guilty that I havent been able to achieve after my father's death over three years ago. I feel I have burnt out and been recovering from illnesses. You are right that I am their agent on this earth, so I owe them everything. A lot to think about.

You feel you have under-achieved you mean?

Firstly, you are still young. There's time ...

Secondly, you are looking at it from a human perspective.
If you had made yourself a millionaire and were driving about in a top of the range BMW, very nice, but they wouldn't have loved you any more, and on the Other Side that doesn't mean a lot.

They'll want you to be happy; to be you - to be true to yourself.
If you live kindly, if you can do something beautiful along the way, then you really will be doing them proud.

But don't be too hard on yourself. The same with anyone, you can only do your best and no-one can ask for anything more than that.

Dear glucan,
Please don't feel helpless. There is never an 'end' to your relationship with your loved ones. There is never a 'final moment' beyond which changes can't be made. They know that now they have crossed over, and would like you to know that too.
Also, they will have gained a deep loving understanding of you, the vehicle of expression you have to work with, your challenges and hardships, your mission on Earth....all of it.
If there is shared love, then it is even more magnified after the death of the physical body. They understand you more than you realise.

Your love, sent to them is the only 'penance' you could possibly pay. Love from your heart, whenever you can send it. Not guilt, not regret, not shame -just love them!

In my very limited experience , A Parent understands that despite their very best efforts you will cut your own path making the mistakes of your own that you personally will learn and grow from and if you hurt them from doing the things you did and getting to where you are...this too they understand.

Our Children are our legacy , thay cannot be as we would have them be..As a part of theoir individual growth , Our offsporing will cut their own path... Decent Parents in this world or in spirit know they did all they could for their part and sleep easily knowing they did what they felt was their best.

There is nothing to forgive your parents know that .so dont be so hard on yourself we all mistakes and if we learn from them that is a lesson learned.your parents would have made mistakes in their time as well.
your parents just want the best for you.they now understand what they didnt understand whilst they were here.
your parents are happy where they are and they want you to be happy in your life too.so there is nothing to forgive


Namaste

Thank you for all your advice. I do send them my love of course, all the time. Regarding achievements I didn't mean material wealth but scholarly achievements (my goal was never to buy a car or a house etc.). But actually you are right, there may not be any difference, in the end I may just be feeding my own ego and saying aren't I special. You have given me something to think about. I really wonder if I do have a pure heart to send them love they deserve. I have so much work to do. Thanks once again for all your helpful thoughts.

A friend of mine did something similar. She felt the presence of her mother in her home and she actually conversed out loud speaking with her with all she felt in her heart and wanted to say. Then what she did was placed a vase on the table with her moms favorite flowers in water, and requested if her mom heard her and forgave her to move the flowers to a new position. She came home from work and they all had completely shifted from left to right in the vase. She had her only pet (cat) locked in a different area of the home so the animal was no where near the vase. She firmly believed it was confirmation that her mom heard everything she said. Just an idea I thought I'd share.

I'm in a similar position. Not so much after forgiveness but concerned by the idea that the dead can see things that they couldn't in life. For example I'm a red blooded male and I look at porn and how can I say it, I obviously relieve myself. I really can't imagine my late mother somehow approving LOL