Seeking Help From Others
 

People often say things like get help but I have found it has ruined me to seek help from others.

1. They don't understand my situation fully enough
2. They believe they do and make inaccurate judgements
3. They actually make the situation worse when I open up my sensitivity and take their advice and then they project back their own lack of awareness and invalidation or limitation

The worst part is, because they say they can help at the start, I go in thinking it is true. Then when it doesn't, they blame me.

I would like to escape this repeating pattern. To never fall for false hope again. I would also like to develop a resilience against unbalanced people.

I have found more recently that taking advice from earthy people has more benefit for me as an earthy person. Particularly Virgo and Taurus.

However, taking advice from unbalanced water types such as Pisces is infuriating.

Nevertheless, I cannot control certain situations or groups I am in where they are the authority figure, and I can't respond in a way that makes them see the reality of my situation or to stop invalidating or judging or blaming me and ruining me unknowingly.

I don't really know what the lesson is yet or what the right reaction is or how to deal with it. It just keeps coming up. It's so annoying to have an inconsistent delusional person thinking they are helping me and making things worse.

I don't know what to say.

1. How do I get over really hurtful things that others say that keep me mentally trapped?
2. How do I take what I need from others and not let them take my dreams from me that they dismiss just because they decide so?
3. How do I still prove them wrong when they doubt me and get others to doubt me, especially after I went to them for their emotional encouragement or practical help and got the opposite?

Hi Imperator, when seeking help or advice from others it's helpful to still stand in your own power and understand that what someone might say to you, you might not find helpful, its just the way it is, even my response here, you can read it but theres no need to take anything from it if you don't want to.


By realizing that the hurtful things others say don't keep you mentally trapped, when someone says something hurtful, it's your thoughts about those words that they said that are getting you mentally trapped. If you are also feeling emotionally hurt from what they said, you can heal yourself from the emotional pain by tending to yourself with love an kindness.


Your giving these people to much power, how can they take an dismiss your dreams? there your dreams not there's, if you share your dreams an ideas with other people and they dismiss them, there aloud to do that, you don't get to control what they think about your dreams and ideas, you can try convince or sway them but still it's up to you if your going to let other peoples opinions destroy your dreams or not, whatever they have said to you, you could also use to fuel your dreams and show them its possible.


I don't really know your situation fully because you didn't explain it, maybe this is a group thing were your all working on something together, idk. But if they didn't give you the emotional encouragement that you where looking for, then give it to yourself.

Imperator,

I can relate to your situation. I've had friends, and even psychotherapists, judge me when I asked for help.

I'm sure you already know this, but at least you don't have to ask the people who mistreated you for advice again.

As far as getting over hurt and anger goes, it can help to call upon a higher power for assistance.

More importantly, know that your feelings are completely OKAY and understandable. Have compassion towards yourself.

Sometimes feelings of anger come from a negative view of self. Just know that you're GOOD ENOUGH as you are. You are worthy and beautiful. You are divine.

You might want to say to yourself, as a meditation or whenever you need to, 'I am beautiful and worthy. I am divine.' It might help.

<< However, taking advice from unbalanced water types such as Pisces is infuriating. >>

After all the pain you've gone through, this statement is extremely discriminatory and hurtful. There are quite a few Pisces here on the forums who are not unbalanced. It'd be decent of you, if you could apologize please.