Awareness Of Being Aware.
 

Well, this all starts back to when I was a young kid. About the age of 8 or nine. I was pretty anti-social and spent my time on my own, thinking and such.
I have always been interested in what really is , so I'd lounge on my bed thinking of theories I could make and become famous (LOL).
One day, it was as if suddenly I had realized I was me. And I could sense me.
I was left COMPLETELY confused, because no matter what, I could not explain the feeling I had of being aware of myself. I'd tell people and such, and they'd just say that maybe I'm a bit self centered.
But I wasn't thinking about myself, I was thinking about my inner self. I came to a break through, I was aware of it then , but left it behind because no one could understand me . I just though I was a weird kid, (Which I was.).
About a few weeks ago, I start researching things about the 'Inner self'.
I had come across so many enlightening articles and videos that really got me thinking.
And just a moment ago I thought, "Wait..Wa-..Hmm.. WAIT A SECOND!" I remember how I felt. If I really concentrate on it now, i can feel the presence of me. The feeling is , again really hard to explain.
I used to try and explain is as self awareness, but that didn't fit it right. I always explained it as Immense self awareness, "I think therefore I am I understood that concept. But now it's more of a "I am therefore I think".
Ever since I've had the feeling of breaking through. Then again I might be crazy, but I just know it's true.

Awareness is the first step.

Aware of being aware is the second step.

Aware that you are aware that you are aware is the third step.

Being aware that you aware that you are aware that you are aware is the fourth step.

Awareness of an awareness of an awareness of being aware of an awareness is the fifth step...

I could do this all day :D

Yes?

LOL , Indeed we could.
It seems as if everything is slowly falling into place with me. Not neccesairly my life, but things that I had thought about so much but I couldn't quite put my finger on what it could be.
The things I experienced and brushed off as,"Nonsense." or always attempting to find a scientific reason to everything.
I have a really strong sense of enlightenment at the moment.
As if everything I wanted to know , I have unveiled, that I have discovered me. WHat an exciting feeling!

It's great isn't it?

Inner stillness you say? I often accompanied the feeling of observing myself as alone.
As if I was one and saw the world through one eye.
I'm a beginner, so there is still much I'd like to understand.
There are things I've experience and experience to this very day, that I still can't decipher, and still try to cover them with reason.
But, what does becoming a 'master' bring?
Is there anything past knowing you are and experiencing the self?
Is it just purely knowledge of I, or is it followed with other knowledge.
I just want to know.

Is there anything past knowing you are and experiencing the self? Rememoration

That's exactly how i feel since realizing and experienced life knowing itself. There is nothing to know after that. It is all that can be known and when it's known, it's known. The rest is learning to work with it.
Blessings, James

It is all that can be known and when it's known, it's known. The rest is learning [/quote]

Could you possibly explain that a little better?

Could you possibly explain that a little better?[/quote]

Recently life became aware of itself in me.........that part cannot be explained but I feel you realize that too. This realization is knowing but beyond that there is nothing to know.
Life aware of itself now expresses itself thru this bodymind and is aware of itself thru it.
There is nothing to do other than what life does thru you. What life thinks thru you and what life feels thru you.
Learning may not be the right word. Getting use to it as it is like being born again is more like it.
It's easy, I find, to slip into unawareness. Life unaware of itself. Noticing that, is probably what i am learning if anything.
I notice that I can speak from unawareness or I can let speaking happen. I notice the difference.
This realization is relatively new to me so keep that in mind as you read my words.
I'm a 52 year old toddler..........and all that can be known, really known, is known.
I am awake.......................
Does that explain it better?
James