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Adoerner 30-07-2016 06:11 AM

Hello to all. I am in need of guidance
 
As a child I remember being able to sense presenses in the house that didn't belong to members of my family and could even hear them walking around and rocking in rocking chairs at night after ever one went to bed. I have also always been able to sense what other's are thinking and to my surprize most people think very little of each other. Some have mastered the art of making others think they really care when in reality they cannot wait for them to leave. I never could understand, why pretend, but O well. I attended Somerville Church with my family. I tried, but could never really get into what the preacher was saying about God. He said God was a vengeful God. Something inside of me knew that couldn't be true. I tried to explain to my Mom but was told I wasn't to talk that way because God wouldn't like it. I all but buried that part of me.
When I grew up I married my childhood sweetie and we had 3 beautiful kids. I remember my mother telling me once that my purpose in life was to have those 3 kids and raise them. Although I loved my children equally I began to realize that that my middle child and I had the most in common. I watched her as she grew into the women she was to become for the rest of her life. I was proud her, she never studied but was a straight A student. She had a photgraphic memory. She had something in common with her siblings they were all popular with the other kids. Maybe because they really did like everyone. For years my home was filled with children. We attended church every Sunday. At the age of 10 she let me know she didn't believe what the preacher had to say about God. She continued to go to great lengths to broadened my horizon on spirituality. At first I was reluctant to believe her way of thinking in regards to the Creator. But, I knew in my heart and soul that what she was describing to me in regards to reincarnation, spirit guides, angels and reiki as well as her belief that I had physic abilities in reality had hit the nail on the head.
She started collage and I realized that we had grown very close, best friends as well as mother/daughter. She got married and our closeness caused jealousy from her husband towards me, This really hurt her and I knew it was the cause of many of their fights. My daughter and her husband blessed me with a grandson who will turn 6 in Aug. He is very kind and thoughtful about life and he truly was born with an old soul.
My daughter and I got into it over something silly, which hind sight has shown me wasn't even important. Her husband feed off it and no longer wanted her or the boy around me. But we had begun messaging each other again. Around about that same time I started having a reacquiring dream that I couldn't recall but made me feel dreadful for hours after awakening. One day while I was getting into the shower I smelt an odor of some sort and a memory of my daughter flashed through my mind. I knew it was apart of the dream. I got sick to my stomach and wondered if I would pass out.
We continued messaging back and forth for several months and finally the message I had been waiting on from her came. She wanted to see me and I wanted to see her too! So, we planned on meeting, the next day, at our old homestead. I was so excited that I had a hard time falling asleep that night.
The next morning I was awakened early to a loud knocking at my door. I sleep upstairs so I stood and looked down at the door and saw that it my son and his wife. I threw my robe on as I hurried to open the door. My smile vanished as I saw and recognized the barer of bad tidings. I whispered; "which one"? His lips spoke her name and in disbelief I asked; "How?" He responded; "She hung herself last night in the bathroom of her home." He grabbed me as I began to shake: I cried out in agony like I had never cried before, stomped my feet screaming NO, NO. From the very core of my being came sounds I had never heard before. My son held on to me until the storm settled.
Now I set here all alone and my mind continues to fill with many unanswered questions. With all my heart I believe that there is someone out there who is reading this right now who contains the know how needed to contact my daughter.. If you could help me figure out what I need to do to enable communication with her then please, I beg you, share your knowledge with me. I would be so appreciative. And thank you in advance.

H:O:R:A:C:E 30-07-2016 07:25 AM

the world that most of us are familiar with is of separation, where each thing
is distinctly apart from all others. there is a deeper level of truth in which
everything is connected. the energy of God is entirely loving, and it does not
keep us distant from anything which is of value for us (such as connection
with loved ones). your daughter exists, and she is accessible to your awareness
from inside of you. i recommend that you use meditation as a method
for communicating with her.
here is a guided meditation i have found that may assist you:
Connect With Your Loved Ones On The Other Side:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gArFvReGImE

best wishes

Robinski78 30-07-2016 12:35 PM

Welcome...
 
Welcome to Spiritual Forum Adoerner - pleased you decided to join us...

Robbie....

metal68 30-07-2016 08:51 PM

Yes welcome to you

You may not find answers here but you will find many, like me, asking questions

Lightwaves 30-07-2016 11:38 PM

Adoerner. Wow. I am so sad for your loss. Your story has affected me. I would like to help out in any way I can. My first recommendation is to remember safety first. There are many who open up mediumship abilities, myself included, only to find an inability to shut them down. Very important to remain balanced as well. Once a newfound gift is discovered the urge, at least for me, is to explore it with passion which can cause things to go out of balance. So, to recap, balance is essential I feel.

As far as closing off a connection goes -- maybe others advice might be more useful. I'm just learning today how to shut down connections willfully. My method involves knowing what I do already. Basically I bring myself to a loving state (a more real non-emotional love). And then I say what I want with who I am. Not in words necessarily but more by being the change that I want. This method worked. Once. I'd really suggest exploring this topic first and foremost to bring about what you would need to be done to safely open and close a connection.

Being in a place of love really is the first thing I would understand. Mediumship can open one up to be confused and unbalanced in my own personal experience. Being in a place of love can carry you a long way towards finding balance and safety in this endeavor. So, I'd like to tell you what I personally do, though others might have different experiences. There is an energetic/emotional way of understanding yourself. There is also a more real way of understanding yourself. The real state is like what you actually feel. So for instance, take the case of one who does not like others at all who chew loudly. It irritates them. The irritation is the surface emotion/energy. But really in the heart of things, the real feelings, it could be a more fundamental thing like disliking basic needs of self as one might not accept oneself. So understanding what is really going on and moving what you really feel to a state of loving-kindness willfully can in of itself bring you out of confusion states and bring balance.

I'd tell you all I know in one post but I've experienced a lot. Another time I might come back and tell you more of my experiences and thoughts on this thread :)

Best wishes to you. Your loss is deeply tragic and I really would like to encourage you to find the balance first. Not saying I know everything because well, that'd be funny if I thought that. Just what I would suggest. Thanks for reading!

Dragonfly1 31-07-2016 08:20 AM

My deepest sympathy for you loss.....(((hugs))) and god bless....

shoresh 01-08-2016 10:21 PM

Adoerner, I am sorry for the tragic loss of your daughter. I have lost 2 children, an infant son and now an adult son.

Sending you gentle prayers. ((HUGS))

Tobi 02-08-2016 12:17 AM

Dear Adoerner,
I am very sorry about what happened. Some Souls cannot bear living on this Earth any more, and that is their own choice. It is no-one's fault. Your girl will be looked after and will see the fullness of her life in Spirit.

Become still, and think no thoughts except a pure love for your daughter. That's all. Hold it as long as you can, don't let it waver, or start thinking any other thoughts, and nothing grievous, pain-filled, or self-accusatory. Recall her in the happiest of memories which you have. Gather all your love for her and send it out to her. As simply as if you were still a little girl yourself, and from the centre of your Heart.
She will receive that.
If that makes you cry that is okay. Some tears are very pure.
Do that as often as you like.
It is even possible you may receive a confirmation from her. That will be a strong heart-felt contact, blessed with her character and her love. You will know very clearly, the difference between what is her, and what are your own thoughts and emotions, if her love returns to you which it might.

Divine Consciousness 02-08-2016 06:55 AM

Greetings,
Welcome most to forums.

shoni7510 02-08-2016 02:46 PM

Hello Ardoerner,

I am sorry for your loss and I suggest that maybe you visit a website called " channeling Eric". It is about a boy who committed suicide at the age of 20 and now he visits his mother. You might find comfort there


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