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-   -   Experiences with online dating? (https://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/showthread.php?t=33500)

Altair 06-04-2012 01:11 PM

Experiences with online dating?
 
So as I posted on here about a week ago, the guy that I was dating for 7 months broke up with me. Those who know of that topic, you guys saw that there were signs of it like him not texting me all week to even say a hello nor has he ever said 'I love you' to me yet. I am going through the grieving stage and yet trying to move on and not look into the past.

But it is hard to find men out there without going to bars and such. I don't go to college anymore. I am quite settled at my job/career and everyone there is already married. All of my friends and their friends are married with kids. Where else can you look? So of course my friends and family suggested online dating. Of course, you have to be careful of the liars and weirdos out there, but I am curious has anyone on here tried it and what are their stories and advice.

Thank you!!

Emmalevine 06-04-2012 01:50 PM

Hi

I met a wonderful male friend through online dating, plus I went on three dates (all nice but not quite right) and my current boyfriend was someone I met through an internet site. I've never met any weirdos and feel the internet is no more safe or dangerous than meeting someone in a pub or club, as long as basic safety rules and common sense are applied.

I say go for it. I'm stuck in a lot with an illness and internet dating has been the only way to meet people. In addition to men, I've also met two lovely female friends on the internet, one is my best mate.

midnightstar 06-04-2012 03:25 PM

Just be careful when meeting someone for the first time - arrange to meet in a public place.

TrainsAndSewingMachines 06-04-2012 03:33 PM

Hey Altair,

I moved to a new country and figured it was worth a shot. Had a really good experience, nothing serious came out of it but no regrets.
I agree with beautydylan definitely be careful when you're meeting someone for the first time.

All the best,
-TrainsAndSewingMachines

Stillness_Speaks 06-04-2012 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Altair
Where else can you look?

You can take an evening class in golf, photography or whatever. More natural approach and conversations. You can also "check him out" a little before moving to anything more.

I'm a man :wink:

gypsymystique 06-04-2012 06:17 PM

I met my ex-husband and several others online. It's not a big deal.

Just make sure that you talk for awhile before meeting, meet publicly, tell someone where you will be and when, drive separate vehicles and take a cell phone and check in with people.

Anyone who wants to complain about your doing ANY of these things is not someone you want to spend time with.

Emmalevine 06-04-2012 07:22 PM

Another word of advice is to get to know the guy a bit through email and speaking on the phone or even skype before you meet up in person. You could always use a spare mobile phone so you don't need to give out your number - mobiles are reasonably cheap these days if you want a basic type.

I know not every guy will be keen on the idea but it does allow you to get some idea of what he's like and of course anyone who isn't genuine is likely to get fed up and look elsewhere.

As gypsymystique said, online dating really isn't a big deal. It goes without saying that you should meet people in a public place and let someone know where you intend to go, plus don't accept a lift home from the guy until you feel you can trust him, but really the same is true for anyone you meet from anywhere. I've been meeting people online for six years now and never had any problems. I'm always very careful but don't let fear paralyse me either.

earthstarr 06-04-2012 07:40 PM

I've been using online dating sites for a few weeks, I had browsed the ones through FB but they didn't feel right. There are some really good sites for spiritual singles where you can meet like minded people. Maybe there's an idea here for the mods........ a dating thread??? :)

Altair 06-04-2012 08:41 PM

Thank you everyone for the tips and for the stories!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Starbuck
Another word of advice is to get to know the guy a bit through email and speaking on the phone or even skype before you meet up in person. You could always use a spare mobile phone so you don't need to give out your number - mobiles are reasonably cheap these days if you want a basic type.

I know not every guy will be keen on the idea but it does allow you to get some idea of what he's like and of course anyone who isn't genuine is likely to get fed up and look elsewhere.


I like this a lot! Thank you.

CatChild 06-04-2012 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by earthstarr
I've been using online dating sites for a few weeks, I had browsed the ones through FB but they didn't feel right. There are some really good sites for spiritual singles where you can meet like minded people. Maybe there's an idea here for the mods........ a dating thread??? :)


It might begin to get rather awkward here if members suddenly starting trying to date eachother.

I think it would be best if that boundary was set to Not have a dating thread. I mean, just think of the potential drama. (And I don't mean that as a preemptive insult to forum members), I just think I am being realistic.


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