How do you go after things the world tells you is impossible?
 

I have my hopes and dreams like everyone else, but I seem to get very hurt when people try to burst my bubble. People don’t seem to like the idea of me having any ambition beyond what’s expected of the average human or me. So I often hide my dreams. But any hint of any hope or dreams I show people will still manage to burst my bubble. So since I was ten years old or so I’ve learnt that it’s better to just hide it. Even when I hide it from people in real life I still get tortured by overly critical people online. They could be directly responding to me, but it’s more likely someone else. I google stuff about them partially because of research, but also because I’m OCD about it. If someone else won’t crush my hopes and dreams I will! How can I learn to stop putting so much importance into what other people think of my hopes and dreams? I also hide my hopes and dreams by joking about them or creating a fake one that’s similar. Like if my dream is to move to Sweden I’ll either joke about it or say I’m interested in moving to Norway. So people will criticize Norway instead of Sweden.

One thing I've noticed in my life is that the more I value something the more likely it will get damaged. It sounds similar to your dreams being crushed.

Earth is dense with negative energy. It snuffs out the best....

Hello Paranoid Hippie.

The way we react to many situations and circumstances as they happen in the present is likely to be influenced by our encounters and experience of broadly similar or somehow connected situations and circumstances in our unique back stories.imo.
If we become aware that particular situations and circumstances in our present cause us a great deal of pain--as seems to be the case here P.H.--and with which I can truly empathise--then a suggestion would be to try to understand if there has been some influencing cause in our personal back story.
It may be that such a cause may be easy enough to see/understand, however sometimes we may not be in a position to make this objective judgement. Perhaps we were too young when something happened to do anything other than register raw reaction rather than objective thought, so the memory is not available to us as a thought process but nevertheless has great influence as a causal emotional response.
In which case it would be beneficial to seek assistance from someone able to help us to gently lift the layers to see if there is indeed some causal experience which continues to influence us. Once the understanding of "why" becomes clearer, then so too does the prospect of at least reducing that influence increase.

This is very definitely simply a suggestion P.H., a possible course of action to embark upon if the pain you experience in this regard is proving unbearable to the extent that it seems (from reading your OP) that you are finding yourself reacting and behaving in such a way so as to attempt to accommodate your fear of disappointment/associated criticism before a possibly disappointing/critical response has been actually voiced.

As mentioned above, I empathise--and sympathise. Good wishes. pete

Why care about other people ?

other people suck, you suck ! :)

Hello dagmar .

Is the "you suck" in your post above an opinion you have of someone in particular?

We all have reasons for thinking as we do, we all have reasons for choosing to give voice to our thoughts in the way we do.

Understanding that is part of understanding ourselves as well as understanding others I think.

What do you think about that thought? ---Not a trick question but asked with interest in your thoughts on the subject. pete

Downplaying the importance of what others think.

Each one of us creates their own reality from their emotions and beliefs. It isn't always obvious, but if you take a closer look at your emotions (fears especially), and your beliefs (expectations) you'll find out that they are reflected in what's happening in your life. They aren't identical, but they are of the same kind: fears cause fearful situations, expectations of disappointment create disappointing experiences, worries of lacking create shortages, ...

The only solution is to change your thoughts (emotions and beliefs). It isn't easy to change, but the goal is worthy.

You can start by avoiding the people, places, situations for which you have negative expectations. They won't change, so push them out of your reality! Look for alternatives for which you have positive expectations, that bring in you positive emotions. When things don't work, move on!

Build your confidence in yourself, and purposefully create the life you want for yourself!

You can use techniques like affirmations, visualizations, self-hypnosis, to help you change your thoughts, and consequently your reality.

Hello all.

Wondering what thoughts you may have about a possible connection/correlation between-- How much we care about what other people think--and--How much we care about other people. ? pete

Couple of things I've tried that worked for me, so thought i'd share.

I always used to care what people thought about me. It was way more important to me what people thought of me that what i thought of me. I was excrutiatingly shy when I was growing up and even as an adult, most of my life, until I had children, and due to those children, I had to change. I didn't want to pass it on to them. So, for them, I had to break out of my shell. But for most of my life I learned how to be invisible. It really sounds strange to me now, but I was so so worried about what everyone else was thinking about me, I wanted to hide from the world, I didn't want the world to see me.

Looking back, I think part was shyness and part was being too empathetic. I was taught to be empathetic from a small child, to look at something from someone else's point of view, and that really taught me that what others thought was more important than what I thought.

The church had a bit to do with it too, the lessons learned from church, from school, from growing up in the world, we are taught as children to be seen and not heard (my generation anyway) and it seems like it was in the water LOL, the TV, etc etc etc. What I thought really didn't seem to matter, because I was taught other people were more important than I.

When you have children and you start to teach them about the world, it is amazing the beliefs you uncover about yourself. So I didn't teach my children the things that I learned (except that each one of us is important, and if you see a child that needs a friend, go say Hi - which sort of backfired on them, unfortunately)

Anyway, you can change your beliefs. That's really what this boils down to.

Change your beliefs, and change your life. I will post a link to a quick audio that Jane Roberts channeled from Seth back in the 60's.

Seth has taught me so much about how to change my beliefs as an adult with adult children. I did the best i could until i found him LOL.

He taught me to try new beliefs on. For just one Week. And see how my life changed. And change it did. So here are some that I tried. It really is amazing what thoughts come back at you to disavow your new belief.

Belief#1 - (in this context). Tell yourself for one week, "It never matters what anyone else believes, it only matters what I believe."

That one was a dosey for me. It really did change something in me. And the things I found myself thinking were incredible. This is all about catching yourself thinking, and what you are telling yourself. About everything really.

Belief #2 - I live in a Safe Universe.

Belief #3 - I am worthy of my love. Look yourself in the mirror everyone morning and say, I love You. - Wow, the first time I tried that, I realized I didn't believe it.

I think we all come to a time in our lives when we have to deprogram ourselves from the programming we have been given.

You are worth it :)

Here is Seth on Beliefs:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlrhvAYgwH8&t=5s

your dreams are yours and no one else's. It's your life, not there's.