Learn to love yourself first!
 

Many people may not realize that their soulmate could be themselves! I have seen this allot that I have done readings for. Many are spiritual both male and female and are connected but "detached" from themselves. I help connect them and help with connecting them to their soul and to the creator.

I've already read similar post on this fourm about this. And to my own fault I never love myself like I'm my own Soulmate . I can't seem to grasp I am whole and complete within myself cause I'm always looking for that "Soulmate" in any encounter I have . It's not easy but I know I can overcome this self loathing it takes time and healing . Being real with myself and opening up wounds that I may not want to discuss . I agree stop trying to look for that Other to complete you and that is what I fail to do.

I don't understand self love. What is it that your loving??? Your personality? Thoughts, feelings? Your body? Everything combined? Are any of those real? The body appears more real than any of those.

I guess self love may be more of a self acceptance thing. Though i'm hoping to lead towards self indifference.

This, I think, is the danger of this "love yourself" exhortation. It can lead to a self-centred attitude that others will not find attractive. Forever on this forum I read posts from people claiming one should kill off the "I", the ego or whatever, then you hit this love yourself thing that, taken too literally, can lead to a feeling of self importance, a right, an expectation that others therefore should love the person concerned.
To me it's more about building up self-confidence in some aspect of the self, accepting oneself for what one is and trying to peel off however many layers of delusion over what one isn't so others can see the "natural" person (as far as is possible and the one can interact spontaneously). The self is a person's divine right. How that sits with others is up to them.

Love is a peculiar construct. No one here has been able to say just what it is so people will always interpret the idea based on their own experiences.
.

Agreed, the body is far more real than those other things. ''Loving yourself'' is a vague thing, you have to accept certain abstractions and 'rules' to understand what it means. The same applies to such essentialist things as 'personality'. Essentialist thinking is a huge can of worms.

Of course, many people are in successful relationships and they aren't satisfied in life about many things. And many people who don't really ''love themselves'', by whatever definition, still manage to be in long relationships. If you're gonna wait until you love yourself perfectly than it might as well happen on your last day on earth. Everyone is wonderfully imperfect.

You can only give what you are.
 

Everyone wants to be with a person who is joyful and knows how to enjoy your life. You should come into a relationship with an intention to share your happiness not with a motive to expect your partner to make you happy, and this can only happen when you love yourself. You can't love others if you can't love yourself. you can only give what you are, so you have to love yourself and grateful for being you to love others.