Demonic Feeling
 

First off, I would like to mention that I am not spiritual, not the slightest bit religious and I would like to think of myself as a rational person.

I came to this site because I think the spiritual community might have an answer or a similar experience to mine.

To the point:
At times I experience a feeling or an emotion which I can only classify as demonic.
A mix between rage and grand satisfaction, a lot of both, it makes me feel alive, in fact in its presence is the only time I feel truly alive.
Fear and insecurities disappear and I feel like I could do anything, I feel powerful yet I am the same, cruelty empowers me, especially cruel people, I want to break them and their will, though I have never done so, just thinking about it is an euphoria.
It is the single greatest emotion I have ever felt, in its absence everything is dull and tasteless, even music doesn't sound the same.

At some point I started calling it "The Demon", even though it sounds idiotic, I truly don't know how else to classify it.

Has anyone else had a similar experience, rage, satisfaction, cruelty, a feeling that is truly better than sex, feeling as a hunter amongst sheep, and if there are others, is it possible to make it more permanent, without it I just feel empty...

As a person who has suffered from bipolar disorder, it sounds to me like you might have a mental illness. You might be smart to ask around about a compassionate mental health center or psychiatrist who could help you. You might be surprised to find out how much better you feel and how much better things go once you have tackled this with the help of a kindly progessional. I know because I was really crazy, and though recovery was very far from a picnic, I'm really glad I got help and be pretty stable now.

This is a great bit of advice, seek professional help, in your heart you know feelings of rage and cruelty are wrong, you need to find out the cause of these negative emotions and get the help needed to deal with them.

Insecurity is better than power. Insecurity leads to understanding or at least attempts at understanding. People with power are tempted to (ab)use it which affects people like me.

So in my own best interest I will not help you. I'm not gonna make another potential threat to myself or humanity, I have too much love for it. You should try that feeling instead, it's far greater than the destructive power you worship.

Old post so I'm sure this person is long gone. Sounds like an entity attachment or even possession. People that channel demonic energies for power describe many of the same feelings you just described. They allow these energies to possess them to feel more powerful, sexual, intelligent....however these energies do not carry love vibrations so these people's connection to God..their ability to feel empathy, love, compassion becomes diminished. It sounds like you have an entity with you that is feeding you this vibrational energy...the thoughts and feelings you are experiencing probably aren't even your own. This is what happens when you are fully merged with these energies they become you and you become them. It's a symbiotic relationship. If it works for you great...but just know that in the long run it is not good for your soul growth or higher self. If at some point you wish to break free and start channeling God energy and love in...you will probably be in for some knock down fight...while you might think that the rage and lust satisfies you and gives you a high...Love and God energy can give you an even bigger high that is full of peace and tranquility. You have probably never felt that yet as you have probably been with this thing for some time. These things cause a myriad of diseases like bipolar and skitzo. Your highs can be helped with meds. a bit, but just know there is an underlying cause that the scientific community has yet to understand. You can mask some of the symptoms with meds...but you can find a true cure through exploring God and your higher self.

Tell this energy to go away, nothing is powerful than you. God has given you all the power. Take control of yourself. Ask your Angels to help you.

I took care of it. :D <3

Root of the problem
 

This by far is such an eye opening post for me on s personal level if you have time can we have a chat please?